Spoilers for season three of The Traitors (U.S.) ahead! Consider yourself warned!
Grab your passports, Faithfuls! Everyone is cosplaying like they’re on vacation this episode, or at least were sternly instructed by producers to up their accessory game. This episode, Chrishell Stause and Ciara Miller are going to Paris (each in a hat and a beret, respectively), and Tom Sandoval and Britney Haynes are popping by the United Kingdom, the former to join the Peaky Blinders and the latter to visit the royal family (apparently, cohabitating with one Mountbatten isn’t enough).
So far this season, Alan Cumming has carried the cast on his back, sartorially speaking, so I was glad to see the Traitors and Faithfuls up the ante this week. Is the cast trying to fill the massive gap Bob the Drag Queen left behind? Did Lynn Yaeger drop off a costume bin filled with her immaculate discards? Even Danielle Reyes, normally a cozy-sweater queen, was in heels and frilly cuffs; frat bro Dylan Efron was letting his gold chain hang out; Boston Rob went full Mafia boss in his velvet blazer; and Wes Bergmann traded his letterman jacket for a tailored suit. And poor Nikki Garcia, whose castmates (even her beloved Bambis!) felt justified in throwing under the bus simply because she’s moisturized and unbothered? At least that corset looked great on her as she was ever so cruelly voted out of the castle.
Unfortunately for the misguided Faithfuls, this competition is about identifying Traitors, not finding the best-dressed Emily in Paris extra. Here are this week’s loyalty rankings based on outfits alone.
Most Traitorous: In her mob-wife fur, I’d expect Dolores Catania to at least be an accessory to treachery.
Traitorous: Wes. I think my hometown Faithful got my Bat-Signal begging him to stop dressing like he made the winning pass at the Rockhurst High School homecoming football game. Lo and behold, he showed up in a suit this episode … perfect to attend, say, a funeral for one of his victims.
Faithful: Chrishell is really giving “In an old house in Paris that was covered with vines lived 12 little girls in two straight lines. They left the house at half past nine … The smallest one was Madeline.”
Very Faithful: Lala (Alan’s dog, if you’re somehow still not with it) in her princess tiara. That little diva could do no wrong.
[Editor’s note: We’ll be talking about the most outrageous outfits every episode this season, so tune back for more. And as far as photos go, we are giving you as many images as Daddy NBC will let us have. We will grovel for more in the coming weeks.]